Leadership - Appreciating the Difficult

The following was published in The Ballston Journal, March 25th.

In my February 4th article, “Business – It’s Complicated (and Personal)”, I wrote about appreciation and personal relationships both inside and outside your business.

Writing and reflecting on that article started me thinking about the difficult situations we encounter in business and in life. Can we really appreciate the difficult? And if we can, how do we do it?

It may be helpful to look at some examples – in this case, all business-related. Let's start by first looking at the difficult employee.

The first step in appreciating the difficult employee is to separate yourself from the emotion of the moment and take the existing moment in context with other prior moments. Evaluate how these moments connect and what they have in common. You may see a pattern emerging that really indicates the employee is having difficulty grasping the task at hand or the process or procedure for performing what is expected. This gives a good indication the employee may need additional training or additional skill sets. In this way, you're truly appreciating the employee's perspective and difficulty that they have in performing the particular duties or tasks, which you expect.

On the other hand, if connecting those moments yields the feeling that the employee just doesn't care or isn't trying or doesn't want to make the effort, then you have a different situation. In this case, to appreciate the difficult employee, you have to help the employee see that you are not doing anything to them; rather, they are doing it to themselves. Their actions and behaviors are not yielding the desired performance or results; instead, their actions and behaviors say they are working to give their job back to you. As a conscientious and fair manager or leader, you have an obligation to take that job back and give it to someone who wants it.

I realize this sounds a bit simpler than it really is. Human relationships are complicated, and to truly appreciate the difficult as well as the non-difficult, you really do have to appreciate people for who they really are. And of course, you cannot change people, particularly if they do not want to change themselves. In appreciating the difficult employee, it is always best to start by focusing on the positive aspects they bring to the workplace. From that perspective, you can then evaluate and appreciate what you find difficult about their actions and interactions. Also make sure you have built a positive workplace, by making sure that employees are supported and appreciated, provided with training and education, and supported by processes and procedures. Knowing that, even in the most positive workplace, you may still have difficult employees..

In the book First Break All the Rules by Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman, the authors describe the catalyst role for managers as what great managers do, not how they do it. They detail four steps or core activities of a catalyst role:
• When selecting employees, select for talent - not simply experience, intelligence, or determination.
• When setting expectations, define the right outcomes - not the right steps.
• When motivating, focus on strengths - not on weaknesses.
• When developing someone, find the right fit - not simply the next rung on the ladder.

The authors also point out that great managers and great leaders treat employees fairly, but not necessarily equally. I believe this point supports truly appreciating employees, both the great and the difficult. Take an appreciative approach, and realize as managers and leaders our primary role is to support and enable employees to get just what they're working for. If they're working to excel, you need to do everything you can to help them excel as fast as possible. If they are working to give their jobs back to you, you don't have a choice; you have an obligation as a leader/manager to take it and give it to someone who wants it.

A similar perspective can be applied to the difficult customer. How do you appreciate the difficult customer? If you focus first on the positive aspects of what the difficult customer brings to your business, you may find they are bringing us rich and valuable information about your business. Perhaps you are not serving them well. Perhaps you are not providing them a great product or a great service. By appreciating their real message, you can find some keys to improving your products and service, and thus your business. Your difficult customers may in fact to be the key to taking you from good to great for all of your customers. If you truly appreciate your difficult customers, and realize, just like you might with your employees, that they are working to move their business elsewhere, then you can also help them achieve what they are working for. Said another way, the best approach in this situation is to help the difficult customer find someone else or some other company that can serve their needs better than you can. In many cases, this just might be the best way to manage these “moments of truth or difficulty” with your difficult customers.

So, the question remains. Can we truly appreciate the difficult? I believe we can. I believe you can, and it starts by truly appreciating the perspective and the situation that the employee or customer is presenting to you and your business. Appreciation starts from a position of attitude. In order to truly appreciate both the positive as well as the difficult, you need to be in a position of positive attitude and looking for the best possible outcome. From that position and perspective you can help everyone achieve exactly what they're working for.

Business – It’s Complicated (and personal)

The following was published in the Ballston Journal - Business Boardroom:

Business is complicated. That is not news or a surprise to any of us who have been in business for any length of time. It really does not matter what size business you are in, or what your industry is, it is complicated. For those of us who are small business owners, we have to do all the “jobs” in the business, or we need to manage the outsourcing of those tasks we do not like to do, or we are not equipped to do. For those of us who are in organizations of any size, we also know that it is complicated, primarily due to the very thing that was highlighted in the movie “It’s Complicated” with Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin, and Steve Martin. Unfortunately, small business complications are not a popular comedy, but a stark reality.

Business is complicated by nature, because it is about personal relationships and people are complicated. Even for small business owners, there is the mix of your own personality and relationships with those of your customers, suppliers, and the interrelationships with your own personality. For larger organizations, add the dynamic of employees with those of customers and suppliers.

So, what then separates the “great” from the “good” from the “just making it”? If business is complicated for all businesses, regardless of size, what really can be the discriminating factors in success? What can you do as a business leader to ensure that you and your organization are achieving the level of success that you really want?

To find the answers, I believe the first place to look is inside. Inside yourself that is. We have all heard it said that “Attitude determines Altitude,” “You get what you are looking for,” etc. I believe these are more than just trite statements or phrases. There is real truth in them, yet for many of us, we lose sight of these simple truths. If we think of the world as abundant, then we will look and act as though there is plenty to go around and we will share that with others. If we look at the world as scarce, then we will tend to hoard and not share.

So what does this have to do with the way we run our businesses and organizations? Answer the following questions truthfully to get closer to your inner self:
• Do we try to hoard information and only let out small bits just to get other things we can hoard? Or do we share information and let people see all the details they need to be fully successful themselves and at the same time make us more successful?
• Is our attitude one of real appreciation for others and what their role is in our business?
• Do we share that appreciation with them in ways that are really meaningful to them?
Psst: The only way we will know that is to be really observant and listen to them with open ears and minds.

I believe that is one of the many messages in the movie “It’s Complicated.” It appears that in their marriage, Jane and Jake didn’t have a common vision and set of objectives for themselves as individuals or as a family. As the movie unfolds, each had come to realize more about what they wanted for themselves, and thus could examine what they really appreciated in each other. I won’t say more about the movie, as I don’t want to give it away. The point is that appreciation is directly linked to attitude, and we do tend to find what we are looking for. If we look with appreciation, we see more positively. If we are more appreciative with our view of customers, employees, and suppliers, we tend to get more abundant results. If we share information to enable each to have a richer experience in their respective roles, we tend to get better results. An appreciative approach strengthens the bond of a relationship.

Think for a minute or two about some of your experiences. In those experiences where you felt really appreciated, where people really took the time to get to know you, or explain how you were an important part of their business, most likely you felt very good about being part of their business. I expect you told others and may have even gone out of your way to contribute to the success of the organization/business even more.

On the other hand, think about a different experience where you were “just a number” or “just a part of the process.” In this case, I expect you felt neutral or negative about the experience and did not go out of your way to do any extra to contribute to the organization’s/business’s success.

I have many experiences and stories to relate from both perspectives, and as a business leader, I like to share the positive stories of how people and organizations grow through appreciation. My colleagues and I, along with a number of others, call that Appreciative Leadership, and it comes from looking at all aspects of business with a view and focus of appreciating what everyone does.

A very successful businessman and friend of mine was a veterinarian. When we first met, he was a self proclaimed “Seagull Manager.” He would fly into the office making all kinds of noise and activity, then crap on everyone and fly out. You can imagine what that office looked like. Then he realized the impact that an Appreciative Leadership approach could make. He took the time to work with each of his employees so they understood the very important and even critical role they played in the total business success. He was able to link their individual success to the business success and show the reciprocal affect on their individual success. He made a fundamental shift in his practice and it was definitely reflected in the positive impact on the top and bottom lines of his business. It was all about personal relationships and truly appreciating everyone and what they could contribute.

By taking the time to understand the relationships and appreciating and reinforcing the positive, the real art of business becomes just a little less complicated and certainly more enjoyable for everyone involved. In the end, business may still be complicated, but with appreciation and understanding by all, it will be more understood, easier to manage, and certainly more fulfilling.

Stop Lights to Roundabouts - Ballston Journal Article

In case you missed it the linked article appeard in the July 23rd edition of the Ballston Journal. In the event you saw the article there, Thank You for coming here to engage in the "conversation".

I am interested in your perspective on the article and particularly the implications for Leadership and Management. What are your experiences that relate to this article?

Thanks again for visiting and sharing. I believe that it is through this type of dialogue that we can learn and grow ourselves and our organizations to better serve our customers/clients.

Ray

Link to the article is: http://www.capconsult.net/pdf/Stoplights_to_roundabouts_-_Analogy_for_Leadership_rrp_20081121.pdf

Stop Lights to Roundabouts - Analogy for Leaders

Happy Thanksgiving to all! In these times of "ups and downs" and "round and round", I thought about an analogy for one of the more recent developments in the NY Capital District area. Take a look at the article found at: http://www.consultingalliance.org/Default.aspx?pageId=271820&mode=PostView&bmi=87055 and then please "join the conversation" on my http://capconsult.blogspot.com- Thanks!